Reflections on Christmas (keeping it simple) Part 1

We decided (as a couple) to keep our Christmas traditions as simple as possible this year for a variety of reasons.  Therefore, we decided not to drag out all of our decorations or even get a tree for that matter. We didn't buy many gifts and cookies didn't get baked.   Before you start feeling depressed, let me say we didn't have a feeling of "bah humbug" at all.   A few of our reasons included the fact that we were going to be out of town beginning Christmas Day, we're remodeling a bathroom which has required much of our time and money, and we could picture our tree getting pulled down and ornaments being drug all over the house for a month!  You'll have to keep reading to find out why the photos contradict what I'm saying.  Little did I realize how much more that less would actually be!  

I realized a week or so into December how much more I was really enjoying this time of year.  Here's what I mean:

- The Christmas section at Home Depot has never been more exciting.  Samuel and I circled the cart twice just to enjoy that giant snow globe one more time. :)

- The glow and smell of our Christmas candle never looked brighter or smelled more cheery.

- The Christmas cards and photos of friends and family lined up on our mantle never brought more joy.

- I was not stressed or exhausted over shopping, baking, or wrapping gifts.  

I can hardly explain it, but taking all of the expectations of what Christmas is supposed to be and what we're supposed to "do" brought a freedom to truly savor the simple things and realize the beauty in them.  

I love how God works.   He's not often early, but He's never late either.  We weren't devastated over not having a tree for goodness sakes, but it's a fun part of celebrating for sure.   Typically we like to pick out a real Christmas tree each year, but like I said we decided otherwise this year.  A week before Christmas Tyson and the neighbor were dropping off a load of construction debris (from the bathroom) at the county landfill.  As they were leaving a local tree farm was dumping perfectly good Christmas trees that no one had purchased and asked Tyson if he would like to have one.  Personally I had no motivation to put it to use at that point, but on Christmas Eve I looked outside and Tyson was putting the tree in the stand and wrapping a few lights around it.   Tyson wanted Samuel to be surprised when he woke up from his nap and he was!  His eyes were big and he went straight to the strand of lights to inspect them.  

I looked at Tyson and saw how much joy it brought him to prepare the tree and have it sitting there for Samuel and then watch Samuel's eyes light up with delight when he caught a glimpse of it.  In that moment I was reminded of how our Father God truly desires to give his children good gifts and I realize so many times I deny him that opportunity by fulfilling my desires in ways I think are best instead of leaving room for Him to do something beyond what I could ever come up with myself.  

Truly, less (of me) and more (of Him) is where I find real life!

Giving Thanks with Family

  

We had a great time celebrating Thanksgiving with Tyson's family this year.  

It was nonstop fun for Samuel with his grandparents, aunts, uncle, and cousins.

Tyson and his mom share their love for NC State and we enjoyed watching football with her.  

Samuel played with followed cousin Bella as she set up a "restaraunt" at CiCi's fireplace.  

 Samuel enjoyed getting right in on the action with his big cousins, Ethan and Gavin.  Tyson would wrestle around with them and Samuel was not intimidated a bit.  When Tyson would get on all fours as the boys were jumping on his back, Samuel would get under Tyson like he was participating.  It was so cute, but I didn't get a picture of it. Darn!

We began getting into the Christmas spirit with the PJ's.  The hat only stayed on momentarily - long enough to get this pic.  He was exploring the bag of cars and trucks at Nana and Papa's house.  

 This is sweet baby cousin, Kenley Micah.  Samuel was relatively gentle with her. He called her "baby."

An annual tradition in the Carr Family is to break out the shotguns and shoot clay pigeons.  Tyson's dad organizes this.   It's mainly the guys, but the girls are welcome to shoot too.   Even Samuel got his turn - just kidding!!! We came out when the guys were done to check things out and have some fun.  

Fun family pic with Samuel and Annabella.

Papa took the two little ones for a ride on the four wheeler.  I wasn't outside for the big event, but I heard Samuel was just sort of "along for the ride" this year.  Maybe next year he'll find it more exciting.  

 Aunt Jadon with her baby girl having some fun.

Papa and gang!

I do this everytime!  I tend to get more pics of the kids than the adults.  I managed to somehow miss getting any pics of Aunt Erin, Uncle Paul, and Nana.  I'm surprised there are any of me.  I'm usually behind the lense instead of in front of it.  Either way, we so enjoyed the time spent with each person.  We commented that it felt like we had quality conversation with everyone.  Did I mention thanks to Nana and Papa Carr,  T and I even went to movie?  It was a great Thanksgiving and we have so much to be thankful for!

Food for Thought

Some friends of mine recommended this book to me a couple of months ago, and it has really re-shaped my view of what judgement is and how my judgements so badly warp the way I look at things.

The book is called How to Stop the Pain, and I have it listed on my sidebar as one of the books on my nightstand.  If you've taken a close look at my booklist you probably saw the stark contrast between "Busy Bees, " "Pajama Time," and then..."How to Stop the Pain."  What can I say?  We've got a wide variety of reading material around here.  Anyway, back to the book...I'm not finished with it yet, but thought I  would share a few lines that have really spoken to me so far.  The second chapter is called, "What is Judgement?"  This guy's definition is one I've never heard before.  

 He says,  Identifying what someone did is not judgement; that is merely observation.  It is when we asume to know why a person did what he did that we have entered into judgement.  

Only God has the right to judge.  He alone knows why people do what they do.  We do not know, nor is it our place to judge why.  In many cases, people do not even know why they do what they do...God is the only one who can truly know the heart.  When people assume to know why, then their reactions are not based on reality;  they are based on judgment.  That judgment causes confusion, pain, and loss.  

Here's another section in the chapter: The moment you attempt to determine why another is doing what he or she is doing, you have given it significance. Keep in mind that nothing has power to hurt you until you attach significance to it.  Another person's actions are only as significant to you as the judgements you pass on them.  The judgment you make is based on your decision about why that person did what he did.  The degree of pain or insult you experience from the actions of another is based solely on the judgment you pass. And the judgment you pass is your assumption of why he did what he did.  

Here's another dinger!  Simply giving up the right to judge would break the cycle of pain and torment while salvaging many valuable relationships.

Is there anyone else that resonates with this?  My family is probably saying, "Thank goodness she's reading this!"  Ha!  Just the simple definition of judgment being when we decide we know why another person has behaved a certain way has been transforming the way I look at all my relationships (my spouse, my child, family, and friends).  It's so easy to think we're "perceptive" or "wise" when in actuality we're making judgements about others and inflicting pain on ourselves.

I was trying to think of an example to share with you of something lately that's happened that's given me the opportunity to give up my right to judge.  Okay, I just thought of something.  We were recently asked by one friend, "Are you going to the party for ...?" (some other friends of ours)  I said, "No, we didn't know anything about it."  My first reaction (on the inside) was to let myself get really hurt and offended and go down the trail of wondering why they wouldn't let us know about it.   Then I made a conscious choice not to decide why we weren't included in the get together.  It's amazing how free I felt after that.  I truly never gave it another thought.  For all I know they tried to get in touch with us, but even then it's really not my place to decide.  I can think about these friends and not feel any offense.  I don't know what's in their hearts and it doesn't change my feelings towards them.  This is just one way I see this truth about judgement filtering through my life and relationships. Then of course of course this shines the light on the countless time I've judged Tyson and decided I knew "why" he did this or that.  Come to think of it I judge myself quite often too.    My prayer is that the truths I'm reading about in this book wouldn't merely be information on a page, but that it would become a reality in my life.   I would love to hear your thoughts too if you'd like to share.

Little Helper

I'm on a roll with getting videos uploaded. This was too funny not to share. This will probably backfire on me at some point!

Little Talker

Hoopster

Samuel can now make a "basket" in his Little Tikes goal. He especially loves to play with Daddy.

He looks so tough shooting hoops in his reindeer PJ's.

Exploring Can Be Dangerous

The events taking place in the picture above led to the nice little boo boo under the eye in the picture below.

 The first pic exposes my laziness in shoving things under Samuel's crib.  Actually, I decided to keep his little suitcase handy from Thanksgiving since we'll be packing up again for Christmas.  In the mean time, Mr. Busy found himself digging around under there.  Before I could be of any assistance in pulling him out, I heard some comotion followed by a red face and a little screaming.
Apparently on the way out from his journey under the crib he collided with the suitcase or some other random object I had stashed and ended up with a bruise and a little scratch under his eye.  You never know around here.  I'm learning daily that childproofing is not a one time event.

Reading Corner

 I made Samuel his own little reading corner this morning because for the past few days he had been taking all his books and sitting with them behind the rocker.  I've kept a big basket of books next to the rocker from my teaching days mainly because we're limited on storage.  He hasn't really gotten into any of these books up until now because he's had other baskets of board books that were more his speed.

 After several days of finding the little rascal hunched down behind the rocker with scads of books around him I decided to pull the rocker out a little, bring his board books over, and make it his reading corner.  Let's just say, he's still back there as I type.  He-loves-it!  You can see he's "reading" to himself in the photo above.  :)

 Now I'm looking for a little chair his size to put back there.  We put his booster seat on the floor for some reason recently and when he figured out he could climb in and out of it there was no stopping him. He got so excited that there was a chair on the ground that was his size we couldn't get him out of it.  This is what first got us thinking that he would enjoy his own little chair.

The Difference a Year Can Make

I found this post from December 4th of last year of a video of Samuel's first airplane ride.  What a sweet tiny little thing.  As I watched the video again, I chuckled to myself thinking about our upcoming flight to Texas this year for Christmas.  In one year's time the sweet little newborn is now a prime candidate for a "backpack harness."   I used to think it was odd to put a "leash" on your kid, but I've had second thoughts picturing us waiting around in the airport.